There has to be a time to draw the line.

Posted on September 8, 2010 by Dani

Yep .. draw the line. Say you aren’t going to try anymore, because its one sided anyway? Accept that it will never be how you want it?

Hubby has 3 brothers. They are all lovely blokes, their wives and families are great, and we have never been in a situation where we have had a confrontation or disagreement with them. Us wives all get along fine, and the kids all get along well. Hubby’s mother annoys us a bit, but she annoys us all fairly equally, so there is never a feeling of favouritism.

Sounds like a great family doesn’t it. So why, in this great family, who apparently love each other, or at least like each other ….. does it seem that all members are incapable of maintaining a reasonable relationship.

BIL #1 …. this one has been shunning the family for years, won’t visit for holidays, never calls, gave me the wrong address when I wanted to send xmas presents, doesn’t bother letting us know when there are serious health issues in the family, pulled out of the family xmas at the last moment (no apology) and generally is non-existent.
BIL#2 …. this one teeters from ignoring us all, to being moderately good at staying in contact. At the moment we hear from him regularly. His new partner is lovely, and he was the only one to not pull out at xmas time, even though it was a huge trip for them.
Hubby ….. this one has his moments, and I have to remind him constantly about contacting family, but at least he’s interested in their lives.
BIL#3 …… this one I am most frustrated with. Pulled out at xmas for spurious reasons, and then sent a container of crumbs as a present, won’t be reliable with his promises, doesn’t answer his phone or return calls when messages are left, had a baby earlier this year but obviously feels that his brothers don’t need to know anything about her, no photos, no calls, no nothing.

Now, before you all say that I should back off … remember this is a normal, apparently loving family ….. there have been no fights, no conflicts or hurt feelings, no rift creating arguments, no disagreements over treatment of wives or children, no negative financial conflicts. This family should be happy.

They may be happy ….. but they obviously don’t care about each other. My poor, argumentative, dysfunctional family are a bundle of kooks ….. but we care about each other. I have had enough. This year, despite my commitment that I would never favour my own family over hubby’s …… I will be getting gifts for his parents, and probably the BIL (and partner) who are actually talking to us. The rest can whistle for crumbs for all I care.

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So very very sad ……

Posted on September 6, 2010 by Dani

I had a terrible nights sleep last night ……. thanks mainly to hubby inadvertently waking me up, just as I was drifting off …. twice.

Coupled with not being able to drop into a restful sleep …. was the nightmares. Or maybe they were just sad dreams.

Dad was dying, he was in pain and alone. And I did nothing. I wasn’t there to make it better, I wasn’t there to hold his hand so he wasn’t frightened, he died alone and it was my fault. And he blames me.

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Fleece cover instructable

Posted on September 5, 2010 by Dani

These are instructions for creating a two layer fleece nappy cover. You can use polar or micro fleece, and use pins, snaps or velcro to hold close.

Fleece cover instructable

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Oh I could smack him one!

Posted on August 26, 2010 by Dani

Its book week, but my child being a senior student (and just not being into it), he doesn’t usually participate in any dressing up.

So what does mr11 (might not make it to 12) do 30 minutes ago?

Only ask me if I can make him a tuxedo jacket! Terrific

Apparently he wants to dress up as Artemis Fowl ….. needs black pants, white business shirt, and a suit jacket. His trust in the contents of my materials box, not to mention my sewing ability at a moments notice and while violently ill …….. is commendable, but misplaced.

A quick search of his cupboard finds a pair of black jeans ….
A quick search of his sister’s cupboard finds …. her white band shirt from primary school, and a leather jacket that doesn’t fit her anymore.

He will vaguely look like Neo from the Matrix movies …….. but I think he will be the coolest year 6 boy ……. and all on 30 minutes notice. Must remember to take a photo.

I think I successfully have attained legendary status.  He He

The finished product

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Discovering a genetic disorder

Posted on August 21, 2010 by Dani

Well, after a routine set of test last week to monitor my Thyroid Function (essential since I don’t eat fish), my GP found some worrying results. In addition to being Vitamin D deficient (critically low), having high blood sugar …… its seems I am showing signs of hemochromatosis, or iron overload. My grandfather has this, and I wasn’t actually aware that its a genetic disorder. The frustrating part, is that when researching the disorder, it lists all the problems and symptoms that I have been dealing with for the last 20 years, including the heart irregularities. But iron overload is often hidden in women. Its only showing in my blood work now, because its been 5 years since my hysterectomy.

So …. I am on vitamin D, I have to watch my diet a bit more (than I already do), and I will probably have to visit the vampires regularly until my iron levels stabilise.

Hemochromatosis

Hemochromatosis is an inherited disease in which too much iron builds up in your body. It is one of the most common genetic diseases in the United States.

Iron is a mineral found in many foods. Your body normally absorbs about 10 percent of the iron in the food you eat. If you have hemochromatosis, you absorb more iron than you need. Your body has no natural way to get rid of the extra iron. It stores it in body tissues, especially the liver, heart and pancreas. The extra iron can damage your organs. Without treatment, it can cause your organs to fail.

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PUL Pocket Nappy Instructable

Posted on August 8, 2010 by Dani

These are some instructions for sewing a PUL pocket nappy, with microfleece liner, and FOE binding.

PULPocketNappyInstructable

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Pocket Nappy Instructable

Posted on August 7, 2010 by Dani

This is a set of instructions for creating an all cloth, Stitch & Turned pocket nappy, with (most importantly) neat, cased waist elastic.  Happy sewing.

Pocket Nappy Instructable

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God she is frustrating …….

Posted on July 31, 2010 by Dani

My mother is so frustrating ……. an adult life of running away when things get hard …… mean that she just won’t settle down.

She is caring for her elderly parents, and somehow has worked it around so that (apparently its their idea) they have packed up all their furniture, and are on this great road trip. It doesn’t matter that they are both in their late 80’s, or that Pop is blind, and Nan is slowing giving in to dementia, or that Pop has major skin cancers that need treatment, or that Nan has been ill for months now, and the latest scan shows a major shadow on her lungs. All three oldies are in a small caravan, and basically leapfrogging from family to family, living off others.

They can’t afford it. They only have their pension to survive on, and a major vehicle breakdown, means they are stranded for weeks or months. They want to travel to outback SA, which given how sick they all are, is practically suicide.

And I can’t convince her otherwise. She can’t see that this lifestyle is killing her parents, and herself too, for that matter. And she is looking for any opportunity that results in them living off others, instead of just finding a rental, or DOCs housing …. and just staying put. If they did that and they needed anything, one of the family will help. But sponging off us, while being so irresponsible, is just frustrating.

I am regularly hit for money. Usually for bills or unexpected expenses. I wonder …… maybe I should start saying no? :'(

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I am so proud of my daughter

Posted on July 11, 2010 by Dani

This week my sister has been visiting, along with her son and daughter. Considering my tiny little house, of course its an adjustment for everyone, to fit in an extra 3 people, and certainly the sleeping arrangements had to be adjusted.

My niece slept in mr11’s room, so that wasn’t a concern, but in order for Sis and DN (darling nephew) to have a bed, miss17 had to give up her bed and room. Additionally, she is on a mattress, in the study … the room closest to DN, and so with his crying during the night, has been woken repeatedly.

Also, because we only have one car, outings usually consisted of me, Sis, DN, Dniece, and mr11 …. miss17 usually missed out. She did get to go to the snow on Thursday, when hubby took the three older children on the drive ….. but normal shopping or touristy excursions haven’t included her. And quite often, we left the older two at home with her, while Sis and I and DN, went to the shops on our own.

All of this has been done with little or no complaint. Although yesterday, we commented to her that we were going to go to Spotlight, and her response ??? …. “I don’t think I can take another day at home with them” .. lol6 … so we took the kids with us.

I don’t think I could ask for a better teenager. She has been great, in a situation that must be trying for her, and yet hasn’t resorted to sulking or antisocial grunting. I am so proud of her.

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Oh the places you will go!

Posted on July 10, 2010 by Dani

If my sister ever gets married, I will read this at her wedding.

Congratulations! Today is your day.You’re off to Great Places! You’re off and away!You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes.You can steer yourself any direction you choose.You’re on your own. And you know what you know.And YOU are the couple who’ll decide where to go.You’ll look up and down streets. Look ‘em over with care.About some you will say, “We don’t choose to go there.”With your heads full of brains and your shoes full of feet,you’re too smart to go down, any not-so-good street.And you may not find any you’ll want to go down.In that case, of course, you’ll head straight out of town.It’s opener there in the wide open air,Out there things can happen and frequently doto people as brainy and footsy as you.And when things start to happen, don’t worry. Don’t stew.Just go right along. You’ll start happening too.

OH! THE PLACES YOU’LL GO!

You’ll be on your way up! You’ll be seeing great sights!You’ll join the high fliers who soar to great heights!You won’t lag behind, because you’ll have all the speed.You’ll pass the whole gang, and you’ll soon take the lead.Wherever you fly you’ll be best of the best.Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.Except when you don’t. Because sometimes, you won’t.You’ll get mixed up of course, as you already know.You’ll get mixed up with so many strange birds as you go.So be sure when you step.Step with great care and great tactand remember that Life’s a Great Balancing Act.Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.And never mix up your right foot with your left.And will you succeed?Yes! You will indeed!(98 and ¾ percent guaranteed.)

KIDS, YOU’LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!

So, be your name Buxbaum or Dowrie or Bassor Mordecai Ali Van Allen O’Shea, you’re off to great places!Today is your day!Your mountain is waiting.So … get on your way!”

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