Mr11, among all his other unique and quite loveable foibles …… has a stutter.
Its not a severe stutter, and it doesn’t limit him in many ways …. and is only an issue if others call attention to it. Its a strange stutter, firstly because its focussed on vowels rather than the starting consonants, and secondly because its only appeared in the last 3 years, rather than from toddlerhood.
So ….. I commenced speech therapy for him this year, not so much to cure him, but to give him strategies and techniques to cope with a speech mannerism that will be with him for life.
I have felt that, because his stutter doesn’t fit into this nice tidy little category … that the therapist is attempting to find another box to slot him into, rather than accepting that this is his unique thing. And so I have been grappling with the question of whether or not he has an anxiety disorder. While he is a sensitive child, and behaves as if he lacks confidence, and he is very shy …… I just don’t believe he is an anxious child. This boy has happily toddled off to scout camp, not knowing anyone, and while I have worried myself into a puddle, he is blissfully happy with his foray’s into independence. He is not frightened of heights, scary places, meeting new people, or trying new foods. He does not have any phobias, or obsessive behaviours. And while he is fanatical about his computer games, that is no different to most other children his age.
As you can imagine, at this point in my life, with the death of my dad, I am more than a bit fragile about just about everything. So why did the Principal pick this time, to quiz me about my son, declare that he has an anxiety disorder, and then infer with her questioning, that it has come about because he (supposedly) lives in the shadow of his sister, and that we as parents are lacking.
At least today, I had some positive results. After completing some assessment pieces with the counsellor, we have been told that mr11 not only comes in as normal, but is consistently well below the borderline area. He has nothing that indicates (clinically) that he has an anxiety disorder. The counsellor feels that mr11 has a stutter …… because he has a stutter. Nothing more, nothing less.
Mr11 is a complex, sensitive, confident but shy, loving and intelligent boy. I don’t want to burden him with the presumptions of others, who seem to think he needs to fit in a box. Today ….. I had a win.